Bollywood trade pundits are fond of saying that the audience can smell?a bad film.? It must be true because I saw Mr White Mr Black at a?multiplex with exactly 13 other people.?
There were so few of us that?the usher declared it free seating. Obviously viewers didn?t need to?come into the theatre to discover that this one is a stinker.
Mr White Mr Black is one of those horrifically bad films, which feels?as though it was cobbled together mostly according to the availability?of the artists.?
So, director Deepak Shivdasani basically shot scenes?with whichever actor gave him dates and then strung it together and?called it a film.?
The happenings?to call it a plot would be a gross?exaggeration?revolve around a village bumpkin from Hoshiyarpur, a?small time conman, three hot-chicks who rob diamonds called Teenie,?Meenie and Zeenie and Don Ladla who accidentally killed his mother and?now watches classic Bollywood Ma scenes and weeps.
I think you're supposed to find this funny but I didn't crack a smile?through the film.?In addition to some awful acting, we also have to?suffer dialogue like: 'Gopi you have such a nice body and such a desi?smell.? Give me a deep kiss.?'
Mr White Mr Black is the kind of film in?which you long for interval and develop a new found appreciation for?the joys of popcorn.? And just when you think it can't get any worse,?Upasna Singh shows up in full-on hysterical mode.?
The only question?that begs an answer is: are actors like Sunil Shetty and Arshad Warsi?so hard up that they need to do drivel like this.? I know you know?this already but don?t go near this one.